The Gospel According to What Can I Bring?

Yesterday we had more than 100 women join our ministry team in our annual Fall Outreach and Fellowship.  This year, our theme was “What Can I Bring?” as we had five wonderful presenters demonstrate and explain recipes that are easy to fix for a crowd or take to a gathering.  As we sampled from each of the recipes and our stomachs were filled, we had the privilege of filling our hearts as Sarah Haskins shared her testimony with our ladies.  Many could not attend, and some due to miles that separate us now, so below is a transcript of Sarah’s testimony.  What a beautiful story of God’s amazing grace!  Thank you, Sarah, for making our time special!

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I grew up in a home where going to church only happened on the Sunday mornings my mom and stepdad utilized a local church’s bus ministry. They used any opportunity available to them to get me and my younger siblings out of the house as often as possible. As I got older and began middle school, I started attending youth group at my older cousin’s church. I used youth group as an opportunity to escape a difficult home life a couple days a week. I probably heard the gospel presented a hundred times by my cousin, her husband, and others at that church, but I wanted nothing to do with it. I felt like I was not good enough for Jesus or anything he was offering. I mean, what could I, a child from a broken home, the daughter of two alcoholics, possibly bring to a perfect God? I thought if people really knew me and what my family was like they would confirm what I had felt my entire life….. I did not belong. So I slowly stopped attending that youth group.

At the beginning of my freshman year in high school, my family moved from Anchorage, AK to Louisville, KY. I remember being so angry to have been moved so far from home and feeling so alone and again, like I did not belong. A couple of months into the school year I met a boy and finally, I thought, I had found a way to fit in. I poured everything I had into that relationship. I gave that boy my most valued possession, something that I had guarded from everyone else my entire life… I gave him my heart. I was happy, someone loved and paid attention to me. I belonged. A few years later came a baby, then a marriage, and then two more babies. Finally, I had the family that I always wanted.

When my oldest son was five, I was on my way to take him to school when I saw a sign for Upward Soccer here at 9th and O. I stopped at the church and spoke with Larry Buchannan, the children’s pastor at the time. I signed my son up to play and we began coming to the church for weekly practices and games. As I watched the moms of 9th and O interact with their families, I knew something was different about them. I felt that feeling again, I did not belong. But this time I did not run away. Instead, I stayed and I watched and I listened. What did these moms have that I didn’t have? What set them apart?

One Monday night while my kids were out on the soccer field, one of the pastors at 9th and O, Jeff Elieff, invited me and my husband to his office to talk with him. I was sitting in his office listening to him present the gospel (which I had heard presented many times before) and finally it clicked. I heard that God loved me despite my brokenness, despite my past mistakes, despite my family background. And he loved me so much that he sent his only son to die for me and my sins. I heard that if I believed in him and wanted to live my life for him I could become a Christian. I would belong in God’s family.

I did not hesitate for a moment. Sitting right there in Jeff’s office, I cried out to God. I asked him to forgive my sins. I told him that I believed in the death and resurrection of Jesus and that I trusted in him to save me from my sins. I told him that I wanted to live for him and him alone. I no longer wanted to fill my life with the things of this world that are not guaranteed, I wanted Jesus to fill my life.

I immediately got plugged into the church. I was baptized, joined a BFG, started attending a ladies bible study, and began serving in the preschool ministry. That feeling of not belonging was gone, it was replaced by the love that Christ had for me and by the embracing arms of His church.

In the eight years since giving my life to Christ I can tell you that my life has not been easy. My husband was an alcoholic struggling with his addiction, my marriage was suffering from the blows of infidelity, and my children were hurting because of the instability in our home. About two years ago my husband broke our marriage vows again and chose to leave our family. After much prayer and wise counsel, I decided to file for divorce. It was finalized about 6 months ago.

So now I find myself as a single mom raising three adolescent boys, working full time, and serving in the church. I have asked myself many times… What do I have to offer others? What can I bring? The answer I have come to for those questions is simple…. Everything. I can bring everything I have because all of it comes from Christ. This world is temporary and one day when I am at the end of my life, I want to look back and know that I did not let my circumstances get in the way of living a life that honors and glorifies God.

I want others to know that, despite my circumstances, I have found joy in Christ and if anything that has happened in my life can speak to others, then I say it was all worth it. I can have that joy because I have Christ on my side and he is bigger and stronger than any problem or situation that I may face. And with Christ on my side I can do anything with the strength that comes from faith in him.

`Sarah Haskins

Sarah Haskins was born and raised in Anchorage, AK. She became a Christian and joined 9th and O in October 2006. Sarah is the mom to three boys: Justin 13, Jordan 11, and Jaiden 9. She works full time for Hosparus and in her free time enjoys going to her kids’ sporting events, reading, and spending time with friends.